Articles tagged with "Sexuality"

It's often a simple notion in your own head... "I like to wear heels and would like to wear them all the time". Ultimately you don't care what others think. You could be gender nonconforming. But what does that mean? This article from Psych Central unravels the meaning and puts it into context with other terms such as non-binary, genderqueer and genderfluid.

"Gender nonconformity is a way of expressing rejection of societal gender roles and expectations.

It isn’t automatically connected to a person’s gender identity or sexuality. Anyone of any gender identity can be gender nonconforming.

It’s best to inquire about how a person identifies and what pronouns they use rather than making any assumptions."

Original URL: https://psychcentral.com/health/gender-nonconforming

While many curious men explore their gender identity at home, often with items of clothing they've acquired by mail order services, they may consider showing up at their workplace in those items as an unattainable dream. There is however some serious research being done in this area by many people to determine the sociological effect of workplace attire and how people who are gender nonconforming, non-binary, genderqueer and so forth are challenging the norm in the workplace.

From the Gender Sexuality at Work Conference 2022, Dr Briony Lipton gives this compelling presentation of her work on "Men In Heels And Workplace Attire" which forms part of a larger project "Invisibilities Of Gendered Inequality In The Age Of Remote And Hybrid Work". Her research on gender equality and changes in professional attire is particularly interesting as it addresses a fundamental shift in our pandemic and post-pandemic work lives where many of us now regularly work from home, or have a hybrid home/office arrangement with who we work for.

She explores "Queer Heterosexuality" and whether there are ways in which straight men can disrupt the dominant paradigm of the straight-masculine and whether this can help to communicate, challenge and influence organisations and individuals perceptions of gender and sexual identities and their perceptions of equality and inclusion in the workplace.

With notable mentions of @MarkBryan911, @The_Heads_Count, @AlokVMenon, @TheeBillyPorter, @GentlemanHeels and @Mens.Heels.Revolution there are a number of other Instagram accounts featured in the video which we'll leave you to discover for yourselves.

Original URL: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=_UCe441EoYI&list=PLhOObpoQndRlSrCjtoprhSRUWCa_qqZ8h&t=4s

It may be true that people say that, but it’s certainly not true that any item of clothing or footwear can ever change your sexuality when you put it on. To even suggest that is ridiculous.

In talking to various people during my research for this answer it was by no means conclusive that gay men are more likely than anyone else to wear heels and boots. They don’t need anyone’s judgement any more than anyone of any other sexual orientation, straight, bi or otherwise who want to express themselves with their clothing choices, but one thing is certain it’s not clothes that determine any person’s sexual orientation.

Deconstructing gender stereotypes is the key to changing this situation. There are many on Instagram who are behind that movement and call it out. We all need to play a part if we want to freely express ourselves. Raising awareness via Instagram other social media and blogs will help, but we also need open and honest conversations with the people around us. While we may be comfortable, familiar and accepting of the notion that clothes have no gender and don’t dictate your sexual orientation, to most people that will be a new concept, so perhaps it's time for a coffee and a chat...

Thank you again to everyone who contacted me with their perspectives on this topic during my research. Much appreciated.

Comments from our readers

We had some great comments on this question posted on our Instagram page for previous posts of this Q&A issue...

"No, you’re a person who just happens to like them. Nothing about being gay or straight etc. Do women who dress like a man get called gay"

"As a pre op transgender wearing heels comes naturally to me, even driving in 3 inch block heels no problem"

"After all it is simply an item of clothing. And when you go back and look at the history of boots particularly over the knee boots and thigh high boots they were originally designed hundreds of years ago for men all of this stereotyping people has got to stop gender neutral fashions should be everywhere and we should just be allowed to wear what we want wearing a pair of boots that are marketed for women is not a sign of being gay it’s just a freedom of your own expression. I seriously wish all boot Manufacturers would start marketing to men there are so many of us out there they enjoy the pleasure of wearing a pair of boots design for women and are afraid to come out there is no reason to be afraid times are changing but they need to change quicker."

"Speaking as a heterosexual happily married man who has enjoyed a lifelong passion for wearing women’s boots primarily low heeled or up to an inch and a half out in public for many, many years under my jeans. I do not agree that you are a gay man who wears them. I simply feel complete and comfortable wearing boots over normal shoes but that does not make me gay at all I have no desire to make love to someone of the same sex. I am not against that. I believe everybody should have the right to live their life really and express themselves as long as they are not hurting anyone. You’re absolutely right the time has come to do away with a stereotype labels put on people."

"Only a few gay guys appreciate high heels. They even often hate them because it’s woman related."

"Of course everyone is free to wear whatever they like, and should! Speaking purely from my experience, I’d say it is more common to find straight guys who are into traditionally feminine shoes like high heels. Gay guys are often into traditionally masculine boots like motorcycle or combat boots. In other words, if you are attracted to women you like women’s shoes and if you are attracted to men you will prefer men’s shoes. So perhaps which kind of footwear one likes does have something to do with sexual orientation—just not in the way many people think."

Opposing Views reports this story on @MarkBryan911 to raise awareness of gender neutral fashion. It's a brief, but interesting story on Mark and his views on wearing high heels to work every day.

Original URL: https://www.opposingviews.com/society/straight-married-father-of-three-says-hes-been-wearing-skirts-and-heels-to-work-for-years

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Original URL: https://www.ruetir.com/2021/11/20/men-who-wear-a-dress-or-use-nail-polish-should-we-applaud-that/

Bruzz interviews Mark Bryan.

“Most people assume that clothes say something about their sexual orientation, and they don’t want to put a label on them that doesn’t fit them.”

“The battle will only have been won when people stop seeing a skirt as uniquely feminine”

Original URL: https://www.bruzz.be/en/culture/culture/mark-bryan-man-high-heels-2021-11-03

Kidadl takes some of the confusion out of raising a child that wants to wear clothes not normally associated with their gender. Kids are born open-minded and are taught social norms by us, like what clothes a boy or a girl normally wears. This is also reinforced by their experience in the world around them. While this article is aimed at boys wearing girls clothes, it applies equally to girls wearing boys clothes, although through deeply engrained patriarchal practice, that has not been seen as carrying the same social stigma. The article concludes that it's fine for a boy to wear "girls" clothes, which it should, as clothes have no gender, and that we should encourage our kids to live as their authentic selves.

It's encouraging to see articles like this as it does seem to show that attitudes towards gender and clothing are changing. Our children are our future hopefully they carry a new hope for future fashion.

Original URL: https://kidadl.com/articles/when-boys-wear-girls-clothes-should-i-be-worried

This article from Catholic University's "The Tower" newspaper asks if we're entering a new era in gender neutral fashion, centred around recent coverage of @HarryStyles' non-binary style. It looks at the origins of gender non-conforming fashion and why it is gaining in popularity now.

Original URL: http://cuatower.com/2021/11/does-harry-styles-mark-a-new-era-in-gender-neutral-fashion/

The New York Times reports on the trend in Spring 2022 fashion shows which is embracing new ideas about gender and its fluidity in fashion. They ask whether we still get freaked out by men in dresses and skirts because we're still holding on to old power structures? and "Is it seen as somehow disempowering for men to have access to classically female clothes? That it somehow... weakens them, since women are supposedly the 'weaker sex'". They conclude that "the balance of power is shifting. These distinctions are just old historical constructs."

Original URL: https://www.nytimes.com/2021/10/11/fashion/the-end-of-gender.html

From the early days of men wearing women's jeans to get a skinny fit, how Women's fashion trickles down to the mens section and how mainstream music artists like American Rapper, Young Thug, Pharrell and Kanye West all wear clothes originally intended for women, this article explores how gender labels are being ignored in favour of achieving an individual style away from the boring stereotypes found in the mens section.

Original URL: https://www.complex.com/style/2015/10/men-in-womenswear-is-a-thing-and-thats-cool

British newspaper The Guardian takes a look at the music and style icon that was Prince. Always more than a musician and singer, Prince spoke about himself through his style, which most notably included his trademark high heeled boots and where Prince led, others followed.

Original URL: https://www.theguardian.com/fashion/2016/apr/22/prince-how-his-androgynous-style-influenced-fashion